I know what you're thinking....

Right you lot!!  Which one of you bought me this darn dog coat?  Come on!!  I'm waiting!! I want names!!
I have a feeling it was from one of the Till family.  You know who you are.  Have you ever tried to put on one of these?  Head first, front legs next and then back legs.  SWMBO bends my limbs like I'm a rag dog.  I have achy joints - she ought to know that!  Then comes the humiliation of having to go to the park and parade in front of other dogs looking like this.  I don't care to think about it.
Well it's not all bad, because Benson has to wear one too.

I have a feeling I may be going for Jellification next week.  There was a murmured phone call and I heard my name mentioned.  There was also talk of the snow sticking to my shaggy feet.  It can only mean one thing - a short back and undercarriage.  Then a perfumed bath.  I won't make it easy.  I WILL NOT.  I shall stand when I should sit, I will shake before Mrs. Jelley is ready and I may even pee on the table.  So Mrs. Jelley ~ BE WARNED.  (If that doesn't get the appointment cancelled I don't know what will.)  I hope she reads this.
I think I'm going to see my cousin Eddie for Christmas.  I hope we don't have to wear Santa suits again.
(I kid you not.  I'll try and find a photo if you don't believe me.)
I think you may all be wondering where I have been since October.  Well, I took a sabbatical.  At 15 and four months, I'm entitled.  Apart from that, nothing happened.
Actually, something HAS happened.  I'm sharing my garden with some foxes! Want to see a picture?  Thought you might. 

They are eating the bird seed and food that SWMBO puts out.  Must be pretty hungry.
Well I thought I'd better get this on before the computer gets taken away to be mended. Judging by the bad language which I am pretending not to notice, I reckon it may go through the window soon.  Windows out the window?  My little pun.  Well, it's time for the last garden patrol of the evening.  I will bid you good night.